There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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