Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
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