One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
