it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
