Hey man sorry I got all grabby
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
