My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
