stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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