yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
why does every cop we meet know your name?
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
