One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
high people should be assigned attendants
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
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