i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
