Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
