i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
