Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Randomize
