who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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