i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
