Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
