please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
