i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Randomize
