he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize