So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
