I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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