Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
