so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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