His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
