Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Randomize
