She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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