Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize
