i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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