I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Drake has all the answers
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
