i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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