Whod you bang
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
