Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize