have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
