Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Randomize
