Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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