can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
My Sexting was not on an AP level
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize