dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
