He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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