I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
