Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
we're so committed to being not committed
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
