So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
You dont lie about slip and slides
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
