pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Randomize
