I heard we made out
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
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