i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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