some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
