I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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