there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
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