I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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