I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
