WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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